Dr. Fauci on baseball

“There’s a way of doing that,” Fauci said in an interview released Wednesday. “Nobody comes to the stadium. Put [the players] in big hotels, wherever you want to play, keep them very well surveilled. ... Have them tested every single week and make sure they don’t wind up infecting each other or their family, and just let them play the season out.”

So, this came out today and at first seems like great news. We are going to have baseball. However, upon closer review, he is happily telling us that baseball is fucked with a smile on his face. Now I am protecting my heart by refusing to believe that baseball will happen this year and putting all my chips on college football. That being said I will be ecstatic if I'm fucking wrong and we get baseball but I refuse to allow myself hope. Let's break the statement down. 

Nobody comes to the stadium. 

This works.... to a point. No fans is fine and doable although that would be fucking eerie. But what about bat boys, groundskeepers, trainers, scoreboard operators, etc.? There are a shitload of people involved in a ball game that you don't see. Assuming a 40 man roster, 1 game would require probaly 150 people. That's insane.

 Put [the players] in big hotels, wherever you want to play, keep them very well surveilled.

Hey guys, in order to play we need you in prison. It will be fucking 5 stars with room service, but still a fucking prison.

Have them tested every single week and make sure they don’t wind up infecting each other 

Now, this is the killer. If they don't get a better test figured out this is fucking impossible. Current test results take 2 to 5 days. Also, they have to put a q tip in your brain via your nose. Now, 29 teams times 40 man roster. That is 1,160 people. That doesn't count coaches, support staff, or the hotel staff required to care for 2,000 people that can only leave the hotel to play baseball. Now, worst case scenario, a positive test. The team they played the day before is exposed, so minimum 80 people. Also, assuming two day turn around on tests, the 40 they faced the day before that are exposed and they have exposed another 40. Now your talking 160 people, not counting coaches, support staff, and hotel staff. Do you isolate 160 plus people? There is no good answer to that fucking question. If you do, the season is fucked again. That will hurt more than not having it at this point. If you don't, more people get sick and you just prolong the agony. 

In closing as always, stay home as much as you can, wash your fucking hands, and follow anything said after the words "The CDC recommends" because baseball may be dead to me but if they cancel college football I may become homicidal.